An Eye for an Iris
by Airyo
Summary: AU Kakashi's first thought as he held baby Ayame was: "It's a human raisin." His second was not fit for replication, as she took offense and promptly vomited all over him. Incomplete.
1. Chapter 1

Generic disclaimer applies.

* * *

An Eye for an Iris - 1

By Airyo

* * *

"Kashi-kun," his father said. "Let's meet the daughter of an old student of mine."

Kakashi scratched at his bare face in thought. He wondered if Sakumo was joking, because Teuchi was a ramen-chef and his calluses pointed to ramen-related things like ladeling broth and pulling dough. The idea of Old Man Ichiraku with a kunai was laughable.

But he still smiled politely, and hoped his father wouldn't linger in the warm glow of the ramen stand too long this time. It was a strange friendship, but Sakumo was the kind of person who could befriend an enemy nin and sit him down for tea if he wanted to.

Then Teuchi gave his trademark laugh - a warm sound from deep from his stomach - and shook his head in embarrassment. "Sakumo-san, that's far too long ago. Are you still sore about it?"

As if it were true.

Kakashi studied the ramen-chef.

Even though everyone called him Old Man Ichiraku, he couldn't have been more than twenty-five. He had a kind, open face and curved eyes that looked like he was perpetually thinking of something happy. If comfort food had a face, it would look like Old Man Ichiraku's. Teuchi was leaning over the stall on his forearms, his little white hat askew and apron stained with ramen ingredients. He was the picture of honesty.

Kakashi looked back to Sakumo.

His father was barely thirty, so the shock of white Hatake hair that threatened to escape his ponytail always perplexed everyone. Even more so when young Kakashi stood next to him with the same trait. Dark intelligent eyes warm with affection regarded him. Sakumo smiled gently at him, and the boy unconsciously straightened. After that disastrous mission two years back, everyone else looked down on the White Fang, but to Kakashi, Hatake Sakumo was still the kindest and strongest dad in the world.

And such a man wouldn't lie to his son.

"Confused yet, Kashi-kun?" Sakumo ruffled his hair. Kakashi scowled at him but tolerated the gesture because his father was laughing. Even if Old Man Ichiraku had a nice laugh, Kakashi liked his father's most - it was a low sound that settled deep in Kakashi's bones, warm like cuddling under the covers on a wintry night. It was a rare sound nowadays.

"I am not confused," Kakashi clarified. "Intrigued." He was already eight, and two years strong into his chuunin career. He was an adult in the eyes of the Hokage and the village. The older men forgot that sometimes. "Teuchi-san is a ramen chef, while Father is a shinobi. Does Teuchi-san need to learn how to fight in order to protect his secret recipe? "

It was a viable hypothesis because Ichiraku ramen was delicious. Yet the older men found it funny. Kakashi decided that he did not like this kind of laughter as much.

"Sorry, Kashi-kun," Sakumo said. "We are not laughing at you." That was a load of bull, but Kakashi was feeling generous after Minato-sensei had praised him earlier today, so he pretended to believe him. "We are laughing because Teuchi couldn't win a fight against a bowl of noodles if he wanted to."

An utter lack of ability to fight was a foreign concept to the young genius. It was easy - a flick of hand seals, a toss of a kunai, and all his opponents fell on the ground like broken dolls. Child's play. So when confronted with the claim that someone could be so inept was...

"I don't understand the purpose of your hyperbole, father," he admitted.

"That's because its not a hyperbole, " Teuchi admitted. "I was dead last in my academy class - graduated late, actually - and for that, ended up on the same genin team as Uchiha Fugaku and Hyuuga Hiashi. I quit to become a ramen chef very soon after that."

There were quite a few stories tucked in between the lines, underneath the underneath. Kakashi was mildly curious, but he was more interested in keeping the conversation going because his father was smiling over fond memories instead of trying to drown himself in the bad ones.

"Why would Hyuuga and Uchiha inspire you to cook? They have very few ties with the Akimichi..."

"If only it were that simple," Teuchi bemoaned. "I was older, but those two were...a class of their own."

"You were the only diplomatic one, and you went and left me to the mercy of those two hellions." Sakumo accused. He turned to Kakashi to explain. "Fugaku and Hiashi fought constantly. The only reason both are alive was because I begged for Aburame Shibi to replace the vacuum of sanity left by that guy." The target of Sakumo's baleful glare shrugged unapologetically.

Kakashi had enough information to understand. The Aburame kikachu were capable of eating away chakra, rendering the victim(s) incapable of further combat. Sakumo had requested a referee, not another student.

Kakashi sympathized with Shibi, because he understood what it was like to be the youngest, yet the most mature. Rin wasn't so bad, though he was mildly discomfited by the girl's obvious admiration for him. But Obito was two years old than him, and Kakashi couldn't figure out how he'd managed to graduate the Academy - likely with help from his esteemed clan.

This Aburame Shibi must have been truly great, because Kakashi found it painful enough to have one idiot on his team. Maybe he should look into developing a chakra depletion technique...Kakashi discarded that idea with a snort. That would only make Obito more late.

Teuchi have a wistful sigh. "I just couldn't keep up with those guys, but I so wanted to be a ninja chef for my comrades."

"What would food have to do with supporting your comrades?" Kakashi could understand poisoning an enemy, but ramen noodles weren't lethal unless one choked on them.

"It is what fuels your body, isn't it?" Teuchi asked.

It was then Kakashi understood why Sakumo kept in touch with the ramen-chef. Not only was Teuchi one of the few people who still regarded the disgraced shinobi warmly, but he also followed the same ideals. Even though Teuchi no longer supported his comrades on the battlefield, he supported them by providing warm food for their empty bellies and a warm smile for their empty hearts.

"So are we going to meet little Ayame-chan?" Sakumo pressed. Teuchi waved his eagerness away as he turned to turn off his stove.

"Just let me close up the front."

Teuchi's apartment was accessible through the back, a cozy place that also smelled of ramen. A pleasant looking old woman stepped out of the bedroom with a tiny pink bundle in her arms.

"Thank you for watching her, Ma," Teuchi said as he accepted his daughter. "Please go get some rest." She exited with a tired wave, leaving the three men with the baby girl. There was a moment of hesitation before they shifted themselves around.

Kakashi ended up on the couch with his father as Sakumo held Ayame. Teuchi made them tea before rejoining them.

"Do you want to hold her?"

Kakashi tried to protest, but Teuchi was already transferring Ayame to him. Carefully, albeit reluctantly, the boy cradled the newborn so she wouldn't roll off his lap. He look down at her wrinkled face. She peered up at him with dark sleepy eyes.

Kakashi's first thought as he held baby Ayame was: "It's a human raisin."

His second was not fit for replication, as she took offense and promptly vomited all over him.

Kakashi could have dodged, but he was also intelligent enough to realize that tossing a newborn across the room like a hot kunai would be frowned upon. So he continued to hold her as he directed an expression of long suffering at his father.

_This is the kind of nonsense I put up with_, his downturned mouth seemed to say.

Kakashi's mood improved after he'd showered and borrowed a clean shirt. Teuchi apologized by giving him another bowl of ramen with extra fish cakes, homemade from his personal kitchen. Homemade always tasted better, even more so when eaten with your precious people sitting next to you.

The ramen had a soporific effect, and Kakashi drifted off on the couch with plans to harness the powers of Teuchi's cooking to subjugate enemy nin.

* * *

Later that night, Kakashi woke with a start. His senses unfurled and within moments, he categorized his surroundings.

His bed was small and hard, and the threadbare blankets were probably older than he was. He could smell rich flavor of broth - in the blankets, in the large shirt he was wearing. He heard the soft sigh from the crib on the other side of the room.

So they were still at Teuchi's. Sakumo must have carried him into the bedroom, as only his father and Minato-sensei could move him while he slept. Therefore, the infant in the crib was Ayame.

Kakashi efficiently made the bed with the neat, tucked edges of a practiced soldier and walked to the side of the crib. To his consternation, he was still too short to peer over the edge. He rolled his eyes (but made a mental note to drink more milk) and instead, leaped up to perch on crib railing.

He tilted his head and scratched his head. How did something so little and cute manage to spew that disproportionate amount of formula on to his shirt? By volume, she was at least seventy-five percent stomach.

Faint murmurs from the living room drew his attention and Kakashi forgot the conundrum in baby-bowel ratios. He jumped back to the ground and crept to the door, where he could hear the quiet conversation.

"How are you holding up?" Sakuma was asking. Teuchi gave a long sigh.

"I see her everywhere," he said, voice hoarse. "Does it ever stop hurting, Sakumo-sensei?"

Kakashi realized why Sakumo had insisted on visiting Teuchi as soon as he had returned from a mission. It was why he'd bought two cards at the store - "Congratulations, It's a Girl!" and "Sorry for Your Loss" - for the same person.

"No. But you will become better at remembering the happy times. Little Ayame-chan will ask, and it will be your job to keep her mother's memory beautiful and bright."

Kakashi held his breath and suppressed his chakra until it burned, a sharp bright point in his chest. Despite his father's words, Sakumo rarely talked about Kakashi's late mother. There were photographs, yes, and the mission reports of the failed mission, the vague infant memories of gentle hands with rough skin and a soft offkey voice. These were all pieces of who his mother was, but Kakashi could not claim that he remembered her. Not when she was gone before he was two, and he understood from a young age that asking about her would be the surest way to cause agony to well in his father's eyes.

So Kakashi learned to stop asking.

But he never quite got the hang of stopping his curiosity.

There was no doubt that Sakumo was aware of his eavesdropper, but he continued to speak.

"I try to live by the ideals of my wife," Sakumo said. "So my son Kakashi can grow to protect this precious village with the Will of Fire. She loved this village, loved what it stood for. She gave her life on that mission because she believed it was important. It helps me to remember to trust in her decision." Kakashi's vision was blurry, with a yearning was a hard lumped in his throat. "In the same way, Teuchi, you need to remember that your wife gave her life to protect something precious to both of you - your child."

Kakashi puffed up, because he understood the parallels Sakumo implied. The boy promised to himself again that he will grow up to be just like his father. His name will strike fear into the hearts of his enemies.

He revisited his mental list of potential epithets he would like to called when he made it into the bingo books. Obviously, he couldn't be called the Other, Better White Fang, but Kakashi knew he wanted a moniker that referred to canines. It made sense since he intended to sign the Ninken summoning contract when he developed better chakra stores. Maybe the Silver Fang, or the White Flash.

(He'd already scratched out the Wicked Wolf and the Growling Awesome Fang, because he made them up when he was six and they were far too childish now.)

Teuchi sounded more relaxed as he sighed again. "You're right, Sakumo-sensei. I need to be strong for the next generation. Our children are our hope for future, after all."

Sakumo hummed in agreement.

_I'll help_, though Kakashi with a fierce expression. _I'll be strong so they won't look down on Father anymore._

* * *

AN:

-In canon, math suggests that Sakumo died when Kakashi five-ish, which is also when Kakashi was first shown wearing that mask. With the addition of better friends in this AU, Sakumo was able to deal with his depression and stick around a little longer.

-This multichapter fic will focus on Kakashi and Ayame, though it's actually a prologue/sidestory to my other story Dreamcatcher. You don't have to slog through all those chapters (though I certainly won't protest if you do ;D ) as everything you need to know will be provided in the story. Which is why I was super-ultra-sneaky and didn't tell you this until the end of the chapter. ;)

-Ayame's name means 'Iris' the flower or 'pattern', but I'm also using a pun on sight, in reference to the iris of the eye. Because coughSharinganKakashicough. Funnily enough, her name can also mean 'to murder' or 'to wound'. Hmmmmm.

-Don't judge me on my names. At least I didn't go with something like "The Tale of the Crimson Murder Iris".

-I've always found it amusing that Kakashi is often described as lupine and has nin dogs. Yet he's called the Copy Cat.

-Finally, for those of you waiting for updates on my other fics...er...oops? Will you take the excuse that my fingers slipped?


	2. Chapter 2

AN: It gets pretty dark in this chapter with Sakumo's suicide. I would like to make it clear that this chapter reflects Kakashi's thoughts driven by grief and anger, not my own.

Please don't read this chapter if you think it might be triggering. You'll be able to pick up enough context clues for the next one.

* * *

An Eye for an Iris - 2

By Airyo

* * *

"What about Ultra Lightning Flashing White Hot Burning Falcon Assassination Technique?"

Kakashi winced. "I think I like Rin's suggestion better, Minato-sensei."

The Yellow Flash deflated, but nodded in understanding. "I guess 'Chidori' would be easier to yell before you assassinate someone."

"Yes, that's why," Kakashi agreed. Minato gave him a suspicious look as Rin stifled a chuckle.

"Look, I've developed a new technique too!" Obito called from behind them. He clasped his hands in the Tiger hand seal, index fingers extended. "Konohagakure Hidden Secret Taijutsu Technique: One Thousand Years of Pain!" Then he charged at Kakashi.

Kakashi nimbly leaped to the side, and tripped Obito as he barreled past him. The Uchiha face-planted, valiantly holding his hand seal even as he slid several feet past them on the dirt road.

"That was going to be nothing more than a gigantic butt poke, wasn't it?," Kakashi asked flatly. Obito stood up with a sneer, though it was greatly diminished by his dirt-covered goggles.

"You just have no style," he said. "And you clearly already have something stuck up your a-"

"Guys...please…" Rin said with an awkward smile as she stepped between them. "We're only a half hour from the village."

"Rin is correct. We should present a good image to the guards and when we make our report to the Hokage. And Kakashi, didn't you push this mission so we could return quicker since you were worried about leaving your father for too long?"

The two boys glared at each other for a moment, before looking away with a huff. Somehow, Team 7 made it back to Konoha without further incident.

* * *

_Rule 04. A shinobi must always put the mission first_.

* * *

Kakashi sensed something was wrong when he opened the door. The familiar cocktail of scents that made it smell like home was still present, but the air was stale and still.

"Dad?"

He found him on the living room floor.

Sakumo looked like he was sleeping, curled up on his side with his back to his son. But he had always been able to sense Kakashi, and he would never just ignore him. Kakashi's heart choked his throat. He managed to stagger the last few steps to Sakumo.

"Wake up, old man," he muttered. "If you're injured, you need to get to the hospital, not impersonate a log."

The past year, Sakumo had slipped further and further into depression. But he always smiled with a tired look in his eyes and ruffled Kakashi's hair. If he could smile, he still had the energy for jokes anymore...right?

"Not funny." Kakashi crouched next to Sakumo, staring at his still back. His father seemed so small and frail without the familiar bulk of his jounin vest. Kakashi was afraid to shake him, to touch him, because then this nightmare would bleed into reality. "This isn't funny - wake up NOW!" In fit of desperate rage, he pushed him.

Sakumo didn't move. Rigor mortis had already set in.

He had already seen so many corpses with the brewing war on the horizon. But his father's undid him.

Kakashi barely made it to the bathroom. He collapsed by the toilet. Then Kakashi's body purged itself, tears mixing with the bitter taste of bile. He lost everything. His lunch, his father, his sanity.

* * *

Some time later, Kakashi shakily stood, rinsed his mouth out, and reported the incident. He sat in the hallway as ninja and medics and an endless blur of strange faces invaded the apartment that had been his home, his sanctuary, for all his life.

Distantly, Kakashi wondered where he would live now. This place was not a home anymore.

Then Minato-sensei squeezed through the crowd like sunlight on a rainy day. He reached down to rest a hand on Kakashi's head but the boy tensed. Kakashi's breaths came in sharp, short bursts as he fought to not hyperventilate - that was what his father always did and Minato was NOT him.

Kakashi turned and determinedly looked at the ground, shaking. His teacher understood, because Minato shifted so his hand landed on his shoulder.

"Come on, Kakashi-kun. Let's get out of here."

_Rule 23. A shinobi must follow his commander's orders._

Numbly, he obeyed.

* * *

The ANBU issue poison pills were meant for captured ninja who had no other way to protect the secrets of their village, not for depression.

Disgusting. Shameful.

It was the escape route of samurai, not ninja, who danced with blood and betrayal like old friends.

Kakashi had tried so hard to fight the whispers, the stares. He had believed, because he thought the rest of the village stupid. He had wanted to believe in teamwork and the bond of a genin cell. Once, he could see himself with such a bond with Rin and Obito.

But then the autopsy confirmed it.

_Rule 56. A shinobi must see the hidden meaning within the hidden meanings._

Kakashi saw it now. He had been too naively to believe so blindly in his father. The truth lay beneath the facade all along. His hypocrit of a father couldn't even follow the rules of his own making, nonetheless the sacred ones that governed all shinobi. Because even if Sakumo couldn't abandon his beloved comrades, he certainly could abandon his son.

Kakashi will never forgive him for it.

The night he heard of the damning label of 'suicide', Kakashi locked himself in Minato's bathroom. He stared at himself in the mirror, dark eyes tracing the long nose and the thin lips made for half-quirked smiles. The lingering baby fat did nothing to conceal it.

He was his father's son, even if he did not want to be.

Minato said nothing when Kakashi emerged from the bathroom with lacerated knuckles. One hand covered the lower-half of his face.

"Sorry about your mirror. I'll clean it up," Kakashi muttered from between his bloody fingers. "But do you have a mask that I can borrow?"

* * *

"You left this."

Kakashi stared down at the blade that Obito extended towards him. His father's chakra blade.

"I don't want it anymore." Kakashi returned to the scroll of shinobi rules he was re-committing to memory. "Take it for yourself for all I care."

"What?! Don't be like that!" Obito grabbed his hand and forced his fingers to curl around it. Kakashi shook him off and jumped away in disgust. "It's your dad's! How the hell can you not want it?!"

"Because it's useless and outdated," he said scathingly. Kakashi walked up the trunk of a nearby tree, feeling restless. "Weapons need to be discarded when they're not longer useful. I guess it was too much to hope that now that you've made Chuunin, you would understand a basic shinobi rule."

"Say that again to my face!" Obito snarled at him.

"Rule 41. A shinobi must prepare before it is too late to," Kakashi quoted cooly. "You should commit that one to memory, as you're always tardy."

"That's not what it means!"

Kakashi huffed. He continued up the tree until he was hanging upside down. "Rule 56. A shinobi must see the hidden meaning within the hidden meanings."

"Stop quoting rules at me! That's creepy and weird, Kakashi."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed, and the space around him seemed to coalesce into something cold and dense. "There are rules for everything. For example," - Obito let out a yell when Kakashi cut off the chakra in his feet, and let himself free fall to the ground. Before he hit the ground, the silver-haired boy twisted, tumbling so he rolled back to his feet in front of the Uchiha - "Gravity. We must obey it because it is a rule of the world around us. The world would not be, if not for the gravity that guides every motion we make. In the same way, we have the rules of the shinobi. You are trash, if you can't even follow the rules that define your role."

Obito seemed to sense he shouldn't push Kakashi. He scratched at his spikey black hair and made a face. "Well then. Rule 666. A shinobi should never make fun of his comrades!" He shouted the final part, and pointed at Kakashi dramatically.

The silver-haired boy snorted, but the hard thrum of tension in the air eased. "Rule 534. A shinobi must not be stupid."

Obito flailed his arms in anger. "Rule I hate you 2. A shinobi should not an asshole!"

Kakashi tilted his head and lifted an eyebrow. "Your fascination with my behind is worrying, Obito. You should work out your sexual frustration with your therapist, not me."

It was easy to goad Obito into a fight, and forget himself between the fists and the fury.

* * *

His days blurred into a series of disjointed memories. Promises, bonds, fond memories - these could be broken, could betray him. But rules and numbers only did the breaking, segmenting his world into tidy pieces and framed the senselessness into something comprehensible.

* * *

Sakumo's name would never be carved onto the memorial, so Kakashi was surprised to receive an invitation to his father's funeral. He flipped over the scroll, disgusted to see the Uchiha sigil on the end of the scroll.

Where had Fukgaku been when Sakumo was alive? It was easy to ask the forgiveness of a dead person. They couldn't really contradict anything you said.

Kakashi almost declined, but Kushina had already seen it. Minato-sensei, he could have disobeyed, but Kushina was...Kushina, and she was the closest thing to a mother that he could remember, more so than the Inuzuka that were distantly related through his mother.

So on a gray, watery morning, Kushina and Minato herded the boy to the Uchiha district. It was a small gathering of Sakumo's closest comrades. Kakashi found it pathetic that the men Sakumo saved on the mission that marked his fall were not present.

But his students, past and present, were there. Teuchi waved at him from across the room. Hiashi stared down his nose at him, and then offered aid in the form of the vast Hyuuga resources. Then Fugaku and Shibi made the same noises at courtesy, trying to use him to ease their own guilty burdens. He knew exactly why they were here.

_Rule 31. A shinobi must not show his emotions._

_Where were you all when my father needed you?_ Kakashi mentally hissed. But he bowed politely and thanked them with empty words and empty smiles.

He glanced at Kushina helplessly, eager to leave. But the red-haired woman was preopccupied, chatting quietly with Mikoto and a Hyuuga woman with sweet expression. The Uchiha matriarch sensed his gaze and excused herself from the other women.

She approached him with a soft greeting.

From Mikoto's arms, a small boy with lines on his face peered at Kakashi curiously. Even though he was around the same age as Ayame, his dark eyes held the sharp glint of intelligence fit for someone older. Kakashi held his gaze, genius studying genius.

Then, the solemn toddler reached out towards him. Mikoto was forced to lean forward to keep a hold on him. The child gently patted Kakashi's hair with a fat baby hand. _You'll be okay_, he seemed to declare. Kakashi tolerated it. Satisfied that his message was received, Itachi lost interest and tucked himself back into Mikoto's embrace.

"Sorry, Itachi-chan can't speak yet," she said fondly.

_Not 'can't', _Kakashi thought snidely. _Has no need to_._ If you can't even see that, why do you even presume to know what I feel?_

Mikoto smiled uncomfortably, as if she knew exactly what he was thinking.

"I didn't know your father very well," she said. "But Fugaku, Shibi, and Hiashi all tried very hard to defend his name. Both to the Council and the others in the village. They're all awkward idiots, but they mean the best. They loved your father. I hope one day you will come to recognize that."

Kakashi couldn't bring himself to contradict her.

* * *

"Ah, Kakashi-kun. It's been a few months since I saw you."

He turned. It was Teuchi, smiling sadly at him. The boy narrowed his eyes in disgust. Here comes the false condolences, the sideways remarks warning him from the same fate as his failure of a father. But his last good memory of that man had been with Teuchi, so instead of turning away rudely, he braced himself.

"Ayame-chan still asks for her Kashi-kun. Would you save a poor man's sanity and visit?"

Kakashi couldn't think of a reason to turn down the invitation. So he mutely approached the ramen stall and followed Teuchi into his apartment.

"Kashi! Kashi!"

Teuchi picked her out of her crib and set her on her unsteady feet. "She's just started learning how to walk. Watch her for me, okay?" Teuchi disappeared as quickly as if he'd teleported. Kakashi stared flatly at the empty space where Old Man Ichiraku had been. That sneaky old...he'd just gotten roped into babysitting duty.

With a huff, Kakashi turned back towards Ayame as she toddled towards him. She attached herself to his knees and grinned widely at him. He was surprised she recognized him even with his new mask. Perhaps she marked him by his hair...

"Hi Ayame-chan," he greeted quietly.

"Kashi!" was the gurgled answer. She was barely one, so the fact that she learned his name at all was remarkable. "Up!" She raised her pudgy arms towards him. "UP! Up!" She bounced, trying to mimic the action for jumping and nearly falling over in the process.

With an inward sigh, Kakashi picked her up. As soon as she was within arm's reach of his face, she grabbed a fistful of his new mask and pulled at it angrily. Wily little child...this whole family, actually.

"Baa!" she scolded. "Baa Kashi!"

Ayame couldn't quite figure out the direction she needed to pull to remove it, but she made up for it with sheer determination and enthusiasm. For leverage, she grabbed onto the forelock of hair that stuck out from under his forehead protector and gave it a painful yank.

"Stop that!" Kakashi said sharply. She released him, but Ayame's bottom lip wobbled. Then she grabbed his face and planted a sloppy wet kiss on his skewed mask in apology.

"Sowwy. Sowwy Kashi. Aya sowwy. Baa Aya."

It was impossible to be irritated when her enormous brown eyes glittered up at him like that.

"It's okay," he said. "I'm not mad." She still looked at him like that. Clearly, she didn't understand him and his mask made it hard for her to tell what he was feeling. Kakashi rolled his eyes and shifted Ayame to one arm so he had one free. He pulled down his mask - there weren't any mirrors around - and smiled tightly. "See?"

It was apparently sufficient, as Ayame squealed some sort of happy gibberish and threw her arms around his neck. Kakashi hugged her, not sure why he was the one that felt like crying.

_Rule 25. A shinobi must never show his tears_.

When Ayame finally fell asleep, he put her back in her crib, recovered his face, and joined Teuchi outside. At the the man's insistence, Kakashi took a seat, but not where Sakumo always liked to sit. He accepted the steaming bowl of ramen the chef placed in front of him.

"On the house," Teuchi said firmly when Kakashi took out his wallet. "You father helped me through a dark time. He reminded me of hope, of believing in the future. The least I can do is give Sakumo-sensei's son a warm bowl of ramen."

Kakashi replaced his wallet with a shrug, pretending not to hear the second part. He clapped his hands in thanks and picked up his chopsticks. He glanced at Teuchi expectantly.

"Oh! Sorry," the man said. He closed his eyes, though it made little difference from his usual appearance. Then to be doubly sure, he turned his back to Kakashi and leaned his elbows on the counter.

He was truly a terrible ninja to expose his back like that. Kakashi almost smiled.

"Thank you." The boy pulled down his mask and began to eat. He still hadn't quite gotten the hang of quickly enough to avoid unwanted eyes, but he was learning.

Unfortunately, even if Teuchi's eyes were closed, his mouth was not. "Did I ever tell you about when you were born? Sakumo-sensei was a mess in the week leading up to it. From what Shibi told me, he got the news when he was eating lunch. He was so shocked he mistook a shuriken for cookie."

Kakashi coughed, a badly disguised laugh. He knew Teuchi was smiling in an infuriating way. "That is in the past," Kakashi said firmly.

"Don't mind me," Teuchi said with a shrug. "I'm just an old man muttering to himself." Kakashi took him up on his offer. It wasn't as if he was actually wanted to hear stories about his disgraced father, but it was rude to leave food unfinished. So he stayed even as the chatty chef continued talking.

"You know, everyone laughed at me when i decided to become a ramen chef. They told me it was fitting that I end up doing that instead, because I was a disgrace as a ninja. Many of my friends turned away from me." The soft scape of chopsticks stilled. Kakashi glanced at Teuchi - the ramen chef wasn't pulling any punches. "Sakumo-sensei was the only person who didn't regard me differently. He told me that the strength of a shinobi comes from his comrades and his precious people. Because the heart of the man wearing the shinobi's uniform, or not wearing it, is what lives on after his body fails. The people and the village he protected are his legacy. Not his reputation."

"He failed the mission," Kakashi said after a long moment. It was the first time he was acknowledging the circumstances leading to his father's death. "That was putting the village in jeopardy."

"Maybe," Teuchi said. "But the way I see it, he trusted his other comrades to protect the village, so that he could risk it to save the ones on the mission with him."

"Then his trust was misplaced," Kakashi said harshly. He expected Teuchi to contradict him, but the ramen chef spent his days dealing with people without the luxury of a weapon at hand. In this exchange, he was the student and Teuchi the master.

"Did you know that the rent for this stall costs almost twice as much as some of the ones further in the marketplace?" Kakashi went to eating. He refused to be the soundboard for a point that Teuchi was determined to make. "Do me a favor, Kakashi-kun. Turn around and take a look." Grudgingly, the boy did so. Teuchi chuckled when he heard Kakashi's soft intake of breath. "Nice view, isn't it? That's why I chose this spot. Best view of the Academy and the Hokage tower. My customers can't always see it, but I can. Everyday."

Kakashi turned back to his bowl. Teuchi had made his point more than clear - Konoha was still here. The comrades that Sakumo believed in did protect this village. Will continue to protect the future generations.

"Sakumo-sensei sometimes visited just for the view, you know."

Then, Kakashi remembered his father here, lanky limbs sprawled three stools and facing the wrong way, with a soft expression on his face as he watched the sun set over the Hokage Monument. How had he forgotten, given how many times Sakumo had dragged him here?

Because most importantly, Sakumo had trusted Kakashi to protect Konoha, to take care of himself, when he couldn't.

Kakashi swallowed. Then he pointed to his right, even though the chef couldn't see the gesture. "Teuchi-san, you have customers."

"Ah. Thank you." Teuchi smiled over his shoulder before turning to greet them. Kakashi wiped his cheeks with the back of his gloved hand and kept eating. Old Man Ichiraku was slipping.

Today, his ramen tasted of tears.

* * *

Many days (and just as many ramen bowls) later, Kakashi almost won his spar against Minato. He had element of surprise, when in the perfect moment, he slashed at his teacher with a blade that glowed bright white.

But it wasn't enough, not yet. Minato smiled as he flickered behind the boy, kunai at his jugular to denote yet another victory.

"Better, Kakashi."

* * *

AN:

- Had most of this written a while back...but just couldn't quite figure out that scene with Teuchi.

- This started out

- 'Mouhi' means 'fur'/'pelt'.

- Apparently, the official name is One Thousand Years of Death, not Pain. This hurts me deeply.

- I made the mistake of rereading/watching Kakashi's incredibly tragic past. Excuse me while I cut some onions and rub the pieces onto my eyeballs - feels about the same.

- This will become less Kakashi-centric as Ayame gets older.

- And less sad. (Curse you Kishimoto.)

- Minato's inability to name stuff makes him my spirit animal.


End file.
